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Testing Again...
Thursday, September 07, 2006 • 11:35:06 PM EDT
Yes, it's another one of those annoying "Testing A New Feature" blog posts.
Nothing of any interest whatsoever in this post.
Push the button, Frank…
Third test...getting there, I swear
Thursday, September 07, 2006 • 11:38:22 PM EDT
Yes, it's another one of those annoying "Testing A New Feature" blog posts.
Nothing of any interest whatsoever in this post.
Push the button, Frank…
This time for SURE! Presto!
Thursday, September 07, 2006 • 11:46:05 PM EDT
I'm suddenly remembering an old Warner Brothers cartoon…one set in that alternate reality where Sylvester the Cat has a little son.
He's showing the kid how to load a musket, but he keeps getting the steps wrong. First the powder, then the shot, then the wadding, tamp it down…BLAM! The gun goes off and blows him upstairs.
He trots back down, face blackened, fur in tatters, all excited. "I know what I did! First the wadding, then the powder, then the shot…tamp tamp tamp!"
BLAM! Again he races back down the stairs, flush with both facial burns and the thrill of discovery. "This time I can't miss! It's definitely powder, wadding, shot…" BLAM!
Yes, the mouse that he and his son are chasing was racing out of the hole and secretly yanking the trigger each time.
Anyway. I think I've got these little problems worked out.
Shot…Powder…wadding…tamp it down…
Digg'em!
Friday, September 08, 2006 • 12:37:33 AM EDT
Hah! Good, it works.
CWOBber now has a brand-new feature, one sure to greatly enhance both your enjoyment of life and your sense of overall fulfillment.
"Wait until you have kids…it'll greatly enhance both your enjoyment of life and your sense of overall fulfillment," your Mom told you just before you wed. And now those words are like sand in your ears. I know, I know. You've been burned before, but this time, it's no jive. During the summer months, when windows are left open, a certain refrain is heard all across the English-speaking world. "Good God!" another jubilant reader shrieks. "Andy Ihnatko is a genius! I have been both entertained and enlightened by this latest blog post of his! And look! The grout lines on my bathroom tub and tile have never been brighter! He got me approved for an auto loan when everybody turned me down! And I can even eat chocolate cake on this diet plan…chocolate cake!!!"
Et cetera. It must annoy the hell out of all of your neighbors when you do that — at least it does before they go and visit my blog — but what's the alternative? You simply must bring that post to the attention of anonymous strangers. Plus, it serves that bastard next door right for blasting his "Classics Of Southern Rock" CD on his patio speakers every damned weekend from dawn to dusk while his idiot friends balance cans of Pabst on their swollen, hairy bellies. If they like "Down On The Bayou" so much, why don't they #%$&ing move there?!?
Shriek no more. If you have an account on Digg or del.icio.us and you'd like to alert the Internet to the presence of a freshly-unearthed Perfect Gem of Truth, Beauty and Wisdom, merely click the appropriate link at the bottom of the article. The appropriate Post page will open automagically, with the article's permalink and title already filled in for you.
Why did I bother? Well, this is another one of those "I've seen it on some of my favorite sites, I thought it was pretty cool, and I figured it couldn't possibly be a hard thing to script into CWOBber.
Plus, I like being Digged. Dug. Delishdug? Well, whatever it is, You can now it me it. I'm being done itted to. I'm…
Well, poop. Clearly, this isn't a post that y'all ought to be Digging or Delectifying.
But do feel free to use those links when you feel compelled to. I've never checked the logs to see how many people are reading this blog because honestly, that's not useful information to me…but hey, that doesn't mean I don't want people to check this stuff out.
∴
In other site-related news, www.cwob.com has been experiencing some wonkiness recently. So if you try to access the blog and get a "Permission Denied" error or if the stylesheets don't seem to load in, just hit the "Refresh" button and that ought to put things right.
Normal service will be resumed as soon as the pixies collect enough moondrops to finish mixing their magic fairy drink.
(Translation: um…people are working on it.)
Finally...a Special Edition I actually want to see!
Friday, September 08, 2006 • 01:50:29 PM EDT
This was the biggest laugh that my Bloglines subscriptions served to me all week:
Oh my. on Flickr - Photo Sharing!
(Warning: Photo is NSFW…no nudity, but it is naughty.)
It's just such a cartoonishly spot-on fanboy fantasy image. I immediately pictured a scene that's certainly playing out in a thousand cubicles at hundreds of tech companies and IT departments all across America today. Drawn by the the sound of a sharp, muffled "pop!" and an acrid smell, co-workers discover the body of a male in his late Twenties to Thirties with a charred, smoldering stump where his head should be. His body is locked into a casual sitting position in front of his computer, fingers still wrapped around a Battlestar Galactica Officially-Licensed Optical Mouse on the desk.
And then at least one of the males in attendance reaches around, pries the deceased's fingers from around the mouse, and emails the link to his personal Gmail account.
I mean, Good Lord. The only way this image could have been made more perfect would be if Jango Fett and Ultimate Captain America were in the background, beating each other with those weird clubs from the "Amok Time" episode of "Star Trek."
Still, as-is, I confidently predict 5,000 image views by the end of next week.
Today's Recommended Reading
Monday, September 11, 2006 • 02:32:43 PM EDT
Today's recommended reading:
My Man Jeeves by P. G. Wodehouse - Project Gutenberg
A brief sample, just to reassure you that I do indeed know precisely what I'm talking about:
"There's only one thing to do," I said. "What's that?" "Leave it to Jeeves." And I rang the bell. "Sir?" said Jeeves, kind of manifesting himself. One of the rummy things about Jeeves is that, unless you watch like a hawk, you very seldom see him come into a room. He's like one of those weird chappies in India who dissolve themselves into thin air and nip through space in a sort of disembodied way and assemble the parts again just where they want them. I've got a cousin who's what they call a Theosophist, and he says he's often nearly worked the thing himself, but couldn't quite bring it off, probably owing to having fed in his boyhood on the flesh of animals slain in anger and pie. The moment I saw the man standing there, registering respectful attention, a weight seemed to roll off my mind. I felt like a lost child who spots his father in the offing. There was something about him that gave me confidence. Jeeves is a tallish man, with one of those dark, shrewd faces. His eye gleams with the light of pure intelligence. "Jeeves, we want your advice." "Very good, sir." I boiled down Corky's painful case into a few well-chosen words. "So you see what it amount to, Jeeves. We want you to suggest some way by which Mr. Worple can make Miss Singer's acquaintance without getting on to the fact that Mr. Corcoran already knows her. Understand?" "Perfectly, sir." "Well, try to think of something." "I have thought of something already, sir." Off you go.
Coy? Me? Oh, dear, no. Not coy, not me!
Wednesday, September 13, 2006 • 10:09:37 AM EDT
So. A. Just suppose that I told you:
- Yesterday, I had a private one-on-one briefing with a Well-Known Company;
- This briefing included some interaction with a consumer-oriented network device that's designed to plug into a TV set and serve video;
- The device in front of me was so hot-off-the-presses that it not only was packed in a custom cloth-lined box, but there was a pair of white cotton gloves packed with it, to emphasize the need to not get so much as a smudge or a fingerprint on it during the briefing;
- I was impressed with said product, and am very much looking forward to getting one to play with in mid-October, as was promised during the brief;
And then I followed this up by saying
- Everything I've said here is absolutely true;
- Even the bit where I say "everything I've said here is absolutely true," I mean;
- I am prevented from sharing anything I learned from this briefing until said product is officially released;
Well, would you just want to beat me like no man's ever been beaten before by another human being?
I mean, just hypothetically.
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